I have been looking at you from afar without you noticing it. Yes, I may have told a few people about you, how good looking you are, how smart and witty and silent you are, but they never knew (and know) how deep I felt (and still feel) about you. Maybe someday, someone will read this blog post and will definitely get a hint about your mysterious identity, but I don't care. Because as I said, in like a month from now, I might have been able to get over you already.
You make me smile whenever I see you around (though not physically), but whenever I see you around the social media circle, something inside me tells me that I should make an effort for us to be closer. But that something is defeated by a bigger something that tells me not to because I might just end up broken. Yes, you reach out to me at times. I appreciate it. But it's just that. It's not consistent. So I must accept the fact that it's now the perfect time to accept that nothing will ever exist between the two of us aside from this shallow friendship that we share and that I should forget I ever felt this way for you.
I never had any serious relationships in my life yet-- romantic in that sense. I even can't imagine myself engaging into one. Maybe I've been hurt enough before. My puppy love experiences might have caused my now-self to build a wall around my heart and stop it from falling hard. That's why I'm making a promise--
I will no longer think of you that way. I won't read and re-read our conversation over and over again. From now on, I don't want to over think. And that, I will finally do what I have always told myself to do which I would like to keep for myself. I already did this before, so I'll definitely make it again this time.
Ciao!
